I’ve brought up this topic before, but the importance of being clear in your communication can not be over-emphasized. There’s a subtle vocal tick careful leaders avoid using–“honestly.” Often we use this word to get the listeners attention and emphasize our message. As a communicator, you lose credibility when you begin conversations with phrases that … Read more
I was re-reading the outstanding Flawless Consulting by Peter Block and appreciated how he outlined the issues underlying phrases like: “These people” OR “Those people” (followed by) “don’t understand” OR “need to understand.” WHAT THESE PEOPLE DON’T UNDERSTAND… So, what’s wrong with this? It separates the leader from the people they lead, diminishes a leader’s … Read more
If you have ever seen the TV show The Office (U.S. version), you’re likely aware that Oscar Martinez is the office know-it-all. In fact, his coworkers gave him a nickname that conveys this particular trait: Actually. He get this moniker because he frequently corrects the facts of others, even when not directly involved in the … Read more
As a political junkie, I’ve been watching political coverage on news outlets lately. There are three words/phrases I’ve heard repetatively that I worry might creep into workplace discussions. They are: Let me be clear Look Listen All three of these words/phrases are time killers, a way to hold their place “in line” before getting interrupted … Read more
Some words and phrases give off the wrong vibe, tone, or meaning. We’ve explored several of these over the course of this blog, and today we’re adding one more to the list. How do these conversations hit you? 1. “Hey Marco, what time is the meeting?” “I have no idea.” 2. “Say Abril, how many … Read more
Effective communication avoids misunderstandings. It can also clear up existent misunderstandings. In our quest to be understood, we may accidentally slip into using one of these versions of a potentially manipulative accusation: “You misunderstood me.”“You must have misunderstood me.”“You don’t get it; you’re not listening.”“If you really heard what I said, you’d understand.” Even though … Read more
Leaders avoid these two words (except in one situation): Never Always Why? Two reasons. One: They’re emotionally charged words. Think about the times you’ve used those words. “You never offer to help.” “I’m always on time.” “I never go in without a plan.” “You always run red lights.” We’re often stressed and maybe have a … Read more
Successful leaders avoid this phrase:
“I need you to…”
Although this is a common way for leaders to assign tasks, it is poor wording for these reasons:
It turns servant leadership upside down; leaders are supposed to meet the needs of others, not to seek to have their own needs met.
Here’s a common question, but it’s confusing and vague: “Would you mind?” For example, “Would you mind getting the report in a day early?” Seems like a basic question – but how do you handle the answer, “Sure!” Lots of times, it goes like this: “Sure… sure you’ll do it, or sure you’ll mind?” “What?” … Read more
There are times in conversations or meetings when you really want to move on, but you don’t want to shut people down. So, you use a generic question that unintentionally telegraphs a lack of openness, rather than a desire to check-in. For example: “Does that make sense?” “Any questions?” “Does everybody get that?” Unfortunately, there’s no … Read more