A few weeks ago, I shared an unusual incident involving an appliance installer, and the Facebook discussion after I shared it online.
After the post, there was a bit more discussion, and I also finally offered my thoughts on the issue. This week, I’ll share that “coda.” Some of asked how it turned out – “whatever ended up happening to that guy?” I don’t know, and I’m not investigating it; it’s none of my business. Is it?
Here’s a phrase to purge: …that would be great. Two reasons why: 1) It’s not specific. If we know that people are more engaged when presented with frequent, specific, direct feedback, then we need to seek out chances to be specific. If something “would be great,” why? Will it make life easier? Help meet a … Read more
Yesterday, while working in my home office, workers from a local store came to install a new appliance. I overheard a shocking conversation that struck me as inappropriate. I selected a typical excerpt, and posted it on my personal Facebook page to see what conversation would ensue. I was not disappointed. This was an interesting … Read more
The phrase “I don’t care” is often used to give permission. It may be splitting hairs to talk about this phrase, but this blog has often been picky about the words that we use. Words are important. Three points, in order from least subtle to most subtle: Use great caution when frustrated. I once witnessed … Read more
Sometimes people feel disconnected from us, because we come off as “too busy.” Good news – there are three words that can reverse this dysfunction. A piece of equipment went missing, and I wasn’t told about it. I found out accidentally a few weeks later, that this $75 piece of equipment had been lost or … Read more
An earlier post discussed the perils of the use of the word “don’t”. “Don’t” is negative, and can also be dismissive. It is direct (that’s good) and easy (that’s why it’s frequently used). There’s a nice alternative, though, that can quickly lay out both the non-desirable behavior, and the preferred: “Instead of…” Use this phrase … Read more
Hannah was a young person volunteering at a community dinner. She sure seemed like she didn’t want to be there. She was listening to her iPod and had earbuds in both ears as she served peas to the public. She was surrounded by about twenty adult volunteers.
At one point, Harold, one of the adult volunteers, finally said something. He scowled, and
I once had two coworkers, Mark and Sally. In DiSC-speak, Sally was a high I, and used many many many exclamation marks in her e-mails. I am not exaggerating when I say that one of Sally’s e-mails could consist of three sentences and 13 exclamation marks. Mark, on the other hand, was a high D. … Read more
One problem with email is that it is efficient for the writer, but usually ineffective for the reader. One way to minimize this mismatch is to
“Hey, Tom, if you could get some of those account reviews done by Thursday, that’d be great.” Sometimes to sound “nice”, we make requests like the one above. It’s casual (good), general (bad), with a deadline (good), but without a specific request (bad) or a way to measure (very bad). The result can descend into … Read more