I’ve written before about insights from Fred Kofman’s The Meaning Revolution, and I will keep doing so from time to time. It’s full of gold. But one page, one paragraph specifically, made me kinda mad. From page 50: “Study after study concludes that a caring manager is essential to employee engagement. Employees want their managers … Read more
In July of 2009, my family and I sat reading in a quiet lobby in a small inn in rural Prince Edward Island. It was about 9:45 p.m. This kind of thing is often hard for me. I like to move, change activities quickly, and have my senses stimulated. Those are all reasons I love … Read more
Recently, I worked with a CEO and his immediate team in a very fast environment. We spent time processing thoughts and feelings the whole enterprise was experiencing during current major changes. This is a relatively small business, and the group I worked with comprised of 80% of the company. So, we had a very good … Read more
In leadership development sessions, we spend a lot of time getting curious about what it’s like to be the people who report to us. By definition of how people usually end up in leadership roles, the leader tends to be more capable, better paid, and more secure in their interactions. This dynamic sometimes makes it … Read more
I really appreciate—and have totally used—Brené Brown’s tools. You can find downloadables on her website. Brené Brown recommends the following phrases to push vulnerable and trusting conversations forward: Often, we have an experience and don’t know the whole story. Then, our imagination fills in a story. For example, Jack might come home with a headache … Read more
We often use the words shame and guilt interchangeably, but this causes problems. If we avoid tough conversations in order to save someone from shame, what we actually might be doing is avoiding important information that simply makes someone feel a little guilt. In a nutshell: Guilt – “I did something bad.” Shame – “I … Read more
I wrote a post back in 2015 that talked about leaders not saying “busy.” The word itself is so commonplace in our every day lives that we say it without thinking about it or considering its meaning. But the word itself can mean several different things, depending on the context and implication. That’s why I’m … Read more
Last week, we talked about numbing as a way of putting on armor. Brené Brown points out that sarcasm, cynicism, and passive-aggressive behaviors are another way to stay distant and avoid vulnerability. The solution is to avoid those three things, and— be clear and kind. One thing I’ve always said in sessions with clients is … Read more
*This blog post contains affiliate links where the author receives a small commission on book sales. I spent 19 years as a high school band teacher. This can be a big job—class sizes of up to 150 students, managing a budget of tens of thousands of dollars, and administering a hectic calendar of events and … Read more
I have never suffered from perfectionism, but I’ve certainly felt the fear of failure. For me, it isn’t perfectionism that produces the fear; it’s competitiveness. I like being the best at things. One year, about 15 years ago, my New Year’s resolution was to be the best Scrabble player in the state of Iowa. Then, … Read more