Leaders must avoid beginning sentences with, “To be honest…” Why? It sends the message that everything prior to this statement was a lie, or that it wasn’t totally true, and it casts your other communication into a less credible light. It also comes across as gossipy, and a leader mustn’t gossip. But that’s not what … Read more
I’ve learned so much from Mark and Mike at Manager Tools. This is one of the best distillations of a major leadership obstacle: When we lead, by virtue of our title or position in the organizational structure, we have built-in authority and power. This is Role Power. The problem is, if this is the only way … Read more
I hit “send” on an email, and immediately regretted it. It was to a friend and colleague. We had a touchy business situation going on, and I realized that I was way too cold and formal in the email, and she was likely to misinterpret it and/or be offended. Below is how I handled the … Read more
Sometimes when leaders are urged to be more “clear” and “direct” with people, they make a clumsy attempt to do so, and end up accidentally being “brutal”. Brutality leads to shame, and diminished engagement. Directness leads to clarity, and improved relationships because of less guesswork and more actual work. Four habits to help you avoid crossing the line … Read more
Good leaders never use shame or public demeaning as a leadership tool. Discomfort, yes. New situations, a bit of a comfort zone stretch, some natural consequences to actions, sure. But shame – to make someone feel guilty as a motivator to change – will only hurt relationships, make observers wary, and send the message that such tactics are okay … Read more
Some leaders are open and transparent with others, and some are more private. But if that privacy is segregating their personal life and history to such an extent that their team feels like they don’t know them, then that leader is at a disadvantage. Leaders who make it easy to get to know them have an easier time developing relationship … Read more
Here is a thought for those who serve youth, young adults, and people new to your organization: Resist the temptation to shield them from “bad influences.” We often work hard to be great role models, and expose those we serve to other great role models and mentors, so that they are only subject to “good … Read more
Early in my career, I had a conversation with a colleague in which I proudly stated: “I will get so much repeat business, and positive word of mouth, because of my total commitment to customer satisfaction.” This sounded like a normal, yet worthy goal, right? My colleague snorted, and said “That’s not so special, Alan. … Read more
Let’s make this easy. If your religious or political convictions are strong, AND you believe that you are called to use your leadership position to do everything in your power to bring your team members around to your point of view, this post is not for you. Go watch the small but lovely film “The … Read more
When I was a teacher, I didn’t get a lot of handwritten notes from my principals and superintendents. So when I did, it was pretty exciting! To think that my boss would make the time to write words of appreciation or encouragement when a pop-by or email might have sufficed, really made a major impression … Read more