I recently read an article by Scott Warrick containing a practical model for looking at trust development. It’s helpful, and I’m highlighting the coolest point. “Seek out points of disagreement with people, then make the disagreement safe.” I’ve written about the importance of making discussions safe, but Warrick’s point is to find small things to … Read more
“Yeah, I ran over my time limit for the meeting, but if Susan had been on time, we could have started the meeting on time.” “Oh, sorry about that. Rickie forgot to include her report. She had information I needed, so mine didn’t get done.” “If you weren’t so uptight, we could have more fun … Read more
Bart’s team is stuck in a conflict cycle. It’s been weeks now, and a resolution hasn’t been reached. In fact, sides have been taken and the team is split in three different ways. Janice, Becky, and Rodney think that customer support needs to be completely overhauled—new scripts, new training, new management, a whole new direction. … Read more
What happens when you feel a conflict brewing? Does your heart speed up? Does your brow begin to sweat? Do your hands get clammy? Do you swallow more? These are all physical signs of stress, and they’re connected to your emotional state. When in stress, adrenaline and cortisol increase, triggering the physical responses above. Your brain … Read more
We all know that honesty, transparency, and openness builds trust which thereby builds relationships. And in conflict situations, this is still true. For some, being open and honest about their ideas, thoughts, and opinions comes naturally. For others, it’s like trying to uproot a 100-year-old cedar tree. Openness and honesty makes you vulnerable. It’s in … Read more
Have you ever been in conflict with someone who just lets it all hang out there? They have no filter and say everything and anything they’re thinking, regardless of how it comes off? My guess is your answer is yes. Communication with tact and respect is the key to building relationships. This is true in … Read more
Because conflict involves strong emotions, it has the power to overwhelm people. That looks different for everyone. For example, overwhelmed people with the C style and S styles may shut down, whereas those with the i style and D styles may keeping pushing their point. Regardless, conflict affects everyone. We all need to pause and reflect, … Read more
Beth is a sixty-two-year-old grandmother of four, who’s looking forward to retirement. She’s worked in the banking industry for forty years and knows the ins and outs of how the company functions. She’s an executive who focuses a lot of her time and energy on business strategy and investments. Armando is new to the world … Read more
Sometimes, by simply acknowledging the feelings of others, you can deflate destructive conflict behaviors and guide the conversation back to being productive. This is an empathetic move. One where you put yourself in their shoes in order to experience their perceptions, their feelings and thoughts, and their point of view instead of your own. It puts both … Read more
Let’s revisit the definition of conflict. Conflict is a difference of opinions involving strong emotions. The strong emotions part is what makes conflict so draining and uncomfortable. When people become too drained, they need time and space to recharge and reflect. One positive approach to conflict that may not seem very intuitive to some is the … Read more