An (abridged) email from Bart, a client: “…and so we just wondered why you would include the TPS module in your proposal?” My early-in-the-career defensive response was similar to: “Why on earth wouldn’t we include the TPS module? Without it, the rest of it won’t make sense; the TLA segment would totally lack context!” And Bart … Read more
Because conflict can be tense and uncomfortable, we might want it to end quickly. DiSC-wise, S types, and even some i types, find productive conflict awkward at times. Caving in works. It ends discussion.
Belittling can be direct, like calling someone an idiot, or it can be slightly more subtle. Either way, when our back is against the wall in a conflict situation, and things turn unhealthy, making others look small is a tactic that can rear its ugly head.
People who speak out tend to be willing to volunteer bold ideas, even if it will put their credibility on the line. If we hold back and play it safe to preserve our credibility, we can make mistakes. I was part of a hiring committee for a non-profit leadership position once. One of the finalists, … Read more
People who are adventurous enjoy the excitement of taking risks and are comfortable with the unknown. Caution is good at times, but not in a visioning phase. Can you name any worthwhile endeavor that didn’t involve some risk? A local community group once had the opportunity to shoot for the moon on raising money and awareness … Read more
Leaders and experts speak highly of the ability to adapt; people who can adapt to changing situations have a growth mindset, rather than a fixed mindset, and can stay nimble in volatile times of change or uncertainty. Sometimes, though, the only time we can develop those skills are in actual crisis situations. Adversity helps us … Read more
Leaders must avoid beginning sentences with, “To be honest…” Why? It sends the message that everything prior to this statement was a lie, or that it wasn’t totally true, and it casts your other communication into a less credible light. It also comes across as gossipy, and a leader mustn’t gossip. But that’s not what … Read more
In previous posts about the Four Levels of Maturity, we’ve explored the notion that Level 2 (Independent) is the most dangerous. At Level 2, people are generally: correct justified able to blame problems on others technically in compliance with standards and rules This is a dangerous place for a team member to be, because they’re … Read more
Sometimes when leaders are urged to be more “clear” and “direct” with people, they make a clumsy attempt to do so, and end up accidentally being “brutal”. Brutality leads to shame, and diminished engagement. Directness leads to clarity, and improved relationships because of less guesswork and more actual work. Four habits to help you avoid crossing the line … Read more
Aren’t excuses so predictable? You almost hold back from asking “Hey, Bill, have you got your TPS report ready?” because you know you’ll hear “I would, but I’m still waiting for Hillary to get the cover page ready.” If you know you’re going to hear an excuse about someone else not delivering, why not head it off at the … Read more