Leaders Use this Phrase in Critical Feedback

Please give frequent feedback to the people you lead. This is your responsibility.

But please avoid giving feedback to the people who lead you, unless they purposefully request it. It’s not your role.

Also, avoid giving feedback to your peers, unless they purposefully request it. It’s not your role.

When peers or leaders do ask for your feedback, don’t look at it as an opportunity to unload. Take the moment to give them a gift; share one observation with them of one area in which they do very well. And, share the impact it’s had.

For example; “Thanks for asking. I’ve always appreciated the way you share credit with other people. It makes me willing and excited to contribute to your projects. That sharing-the-credit thing is cool, and you’re good at it. I thought you’d want to know.”

“I thought you’d want to know.”

That last sentence is optional in the case of positive feedback, but not when it’s critical. And, it’s okay to share critical feedback – IF:

  1. You have a great relationship with them.
  2. You conclude with “I thought you’d want to know.” Then leave them alone, and never bring it up again unless they do.

If your relationship with a peer is incredibly stellar, then in rare situations, you may share critical feedback. But be very careful.

DSC_0768_2Thanks for reading,

Alan Feirer

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